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If You Think the Coffee Sucks, Wait Until You Meet the Owner Any feedback or questions? Send them to zyhperini@yahoo.com "I don’t know what I’m supposed to do," Jeongin said, head pillowed back on Jisung's chest. "I know," Jisung said. He nuzzled at Jeongin's hair, breathing in the combined scents of coconut shampoo and beloved packmate. “You don’t have to do anything right now.” They lay back to front along the length of the brutally uncomfortable break room couch, Jisung lightly rocking them both and creating a rhythmic creak in the support frame. The position had Jisung's lower back twinging at him warningly, but he was determined to tough it out a while longer. The closeness was as much to comfort himself as it was to comfort Jeongin. He wanted to feel relief. He did feel relieved. When Jeongin looked to them and said he belonged with them, the relief had been immeasurable. It wasn't that Jisung doubted Jeongin's affection for him and Chan. He was just a realist. Yang Jeongin had history with his baby-sires. Messy history, sure, but those months and years of connection counted for something even before the raw biology of making a child together entered the picture. If either of the sires offered better prospects than he and Chan could... well. After Jisung mated with Bang Chan, he realized he'd live in a sewer with the alpha, if it came to that, because the sense of belonging and safety with him was more important than anything else. He'd already abandoned his vengeance quest at that point, and baring a few hiccups, (like subjecting himself to the sporadic presence of his number one murder suspect) (and no, Detective Seo, he doesn't think he'd imagined that CCTV footage out of grief, fuck you very much sir) it was the single best decision he'd made in his life. So what was one more leap? He’d hoped Yang Jeongin wouldn’t regret taking his own leap with them, but it wouldn’t have been a surprise if the arrival of a safer bet turned his head. Heartbreaking, but not surprising. Turned out, Jeongin’s stupidly-pretty beta was more interested in coming with him than taking him away. Fucking wild. Jisung should only be feeling relief. Not this restless worry buzzing under the surface of his skin, gnawing inward, chewing at his guts. His right leg braced against the floor to give him leverage for the rocking. He would’ve been bouncing it otherwise. “Give us the word and Channie and I will drive him off,” Jisung said, “We’ll get Binnie to help.” Assuming Changbin wanted to help. Cared to help. He played back the mental image of Seo Changbin leaving; eyelids heavy, eyes averted, brows low. The corners of his mouth tucked in like he was trying to keep from frowning or snarling. A barely-there sourness coloring his normally soothing wood and soap scent. Angry sour? Sad sour? Annoyed sour? Jisung shoved his leg harder against the ground. Whatever Seo Changbin’s problem was, there was no excuse for just bailing on them like that. Especially not when there was some outsider sniffing around. Changbin was always demanding they let him look after them, so why did he skip out now? Jeongin dragged out a long, low whine. “I really, really thought hyung was in love with that pack,” he said, “He was always bragging about them, about the stuff they got him or the places they took him. It used to piss me off so much.” Jisung slowed down his rocking. That seemed like a lot of emotion for a one off rebound spite fuck. “It pissed you off?” he asked, trying to keep his voice gently inquisitive and not, you know, wildly suspicious. Even from the high angle, Jisung could see the ‘obviously, dipshit’ expression on Jeongin’s face. “Yes?” Jeongin said, voice rising slightly with incredulity, “Who wants to hear some big brother brag about their romantic life? I couldn’t even hint at mine, but I had to hear about his every day. So annoying.” Hmm. “You two hung out every day?” “No, not every day, it was just a lot.” Jeongin went quiet for a moment. “Hyung liked to me he was a loner who’d would rather do things by himself. I asked him, if that’s true, why can’t I go anywhere without tripping over you? He said ‘my body just naturally follows yours.’” Jeongin scoffed. “He’s so lame. Even remembering it gives me goosebumps.” Oh, he’s super in love with you, Jisung thought. He remembered Hwang Hyunjin sat that stool, soft sweater hanging wide around his beautiful clavicle; long, silky-looking black hair in disarray from being pulled at; lush lips pushed up with his bold declaration. ‘Then I belong here, too.’ Naturally following were Yang Jeongin led, despite not knowing Chan from a hole in the ground. Talk about taking leaps. But what were Jeongin’s actual feelings in this equation? “Innie,” Jisung said slowly, trying to figure out the right way to word this, “This feels like a weird question to ask, but why did you sleep with Hwang-ssi?” Jisung had known the baby’s beta-sire was one of Jeongin’s friends, but it was a ‘friend’ that Jeongin was terrified of inconveniencing or opening up to. Which, in Jisung’s mind, put him on the same level as Jeongin’s awful birth-pack in terms of trustworthiness. If any of Jisung's friends had gotten him pregnant, he'd – uh, well, he never would've slept around outside of a pack in the first place, so maybe he was a bad example, but if he did have a fling, it'd be with someone he felt comfortable telling about a pregnancy. If he wasn’t comfortable with them, then he must not have liked them all that much from the start. That’s where he’d thought Jeongin was at when it came to the baby’s sires. Now it was starting to feel like he’d read the whole thing backwards. “I mean, out of all your friends,” Jisung went on when Jeongin didn’t immediately answer, “Aside from the spite thing, and his, you know.” He sketched out a wide circle in the air. “Entire fucking everything.” “He is beautiful, isn’t he?” Jeongin asked wistfully, “I didn’t think a person could be that beautiful until I met him. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. It’s all a trick, though.” He snorted, but it didn’t quite hide the fondness. “He’s actually a disaster.” Silence fell. “Not really answering my question, Innie.” Jeongin groaned, and tried to turn sideways into the back of the couch, elbowing Jisung’s stomach in the process. It took a moment for them to sort themselves out again and Jeongin finally opted to sit up. Jisung missed his warmth and weight immediately. “Look, I know what you’re asking. I didn’t sleep with hyung because I was secretly in love with him the whole time.” Jeognin discarded the idea with a sweep of his hand, his back facing Jisung, “I invited him over that day because I was in a bad mood and I wanted someone to get drunk with. Hyunjin-hyung is a fun drunk and he’s always made me feel better. But it was mess. I couldn’t let any of my real feelings out and Hyung had no idea how upset I was, so everything he did just made me feel worse. When Hwang Hyunjin started talking about his stupid pack again, something in me just snapped. “At first, I started flirting with him so he’d shut up about them and pay attention to me instead. But then I realized it didn’t have to stop with the flirting. I didn’t have an alpha’s feelings to consider anymore and hyung wasn’t exclusive to his pack. I know how dumb this sounds now, but coming on to him really felt like the solution to everything I was feeling right then. Hyung didn’t want to mate me, so it could be a casual friend-fling without deeper feelings, and I could show my ex-alpha how much I didn’t have to care about him anymore.” Jeongin’s back expanded outward in a deep inhale. “I can’t believe it managed to go this wrong.” Jisung pressed a palm to Jeongin’s lower back where it was bracketed by Jisung’s thighs. The fabric of his hoodie rode up slightly, showing a strip of warm skin and a mole Jisung hadn’t had the chance to discover before. Flirting with someone to get them to focus on you and shut up about their other relationships wasn’t ‘being annoyed’; that was pure territorial possessiveness. And yeah, that level of possessiveness could get kicked up by platonic feelings as much as by romantic. Jisung had his doubts but it wasn't like he hadn't encountered the concept before. It was an especially common theme in anime, after all. (“Howl’s Moving Castle” even played with it by having Calcifer throw a fit over Prince Justin propositioning Sophie and Howl. Sophie pointed out that Calcifer had no say because he wasn’t technically their packmate and he sulked so hard about it, Howl announced that Calcifer had held his heart for so long, it counted for the same thing. Easily one of Jisung’s favorite scenes.) Whether Jeongin’s feelings for Hwang Hyunjin were romantic or platonic, they were strong. Strong enough to set him into a jealous fit when Hyunjin’s affections wandered elsewhere and that didn’t point toward Hyunjin being driven away from their pack any time soon. At least not without a lot of effort. Which again, Jisung would feel a lot better about if a certain someone stuck around longer. He could only hope this new disruption in their lives would be a good thing and not explode the careful balance they’d been crafting. He felt a hand on his. “Ah?” “You were scratching yourself pretty hard,” Jeongin said, looking over his shoulder. He was holding Jisung’s hand pressed against his thigh. Now that he was paying attention, Jisung could feel the side of his thigh starting to sting. He hadn’t felt himself doing it. Great. “It was itchy. I think I got a bug bite or something.” He slid his hand free of Jeongin’s and scooted back so he could sit up without uncomfortably smashing his dick against Jeongin’s ass. Not the relationship he wanted his dick and Jeongin’s ass to be having. “Seriously don’t worry about it,” he went on, catching the suspicious side-eye he was getting. The last thing he wanted to do was explain one of his anxiety tells. “I’m the one looking after you right now, okay? Let’s stay on subject.” He nuzzled into Jeongin’s neck and kissed his scent gland. “It’s not a one-way thing,” Jeongin muttered. “Innie,” Jisung said, desperate to get the focus back off himself, “What made you so sure Hwang Hyunjin didn’t want to mate you?” For a moment, he didn’t think Jeongin was going to take the bait, but Jeongin sighed and his critical look turned weary. “He never introduced me to his courting pack. He should’ve jumped at the chance to hook me up with his alphas, but he kept finding excuses to keep me away from them instead. I thought it was a pretty clear sign he wasn't serious.” “...that is pretty extreme. Even between friends, it’s normal to meet each other’s packmates.” Jisung admitted, “If a big brother was keeping me away from his pack, I’d worry he was ashamed of either me or them, and both options suck.” Jeongin opened his mouth and closed it. He stared up at the ceiling like it was calling him bad names. “You know,” he said, “It never occurred to me that it could be an issue with his pack instead of with me. I guess that matches with what he said earlier, but it still doesn’t make sense. Hyunjinnie-hyung is so loud with his emotions. I don’t understand how he was struggling all this time and he didn’t show any of it.” “I mean, people are like that. They scream about one thing so you won’t notice how much they’re not talking about something else. I bet he’d explain it to you more, if you asked.” “Unless he keeps hiding things.” “Sure, but that’ll just give us more reason to turn him down.” Jisung rested his arms loosely around Jeongin’s waist. He imagined all the jittering nerves inside him smoothed over by the solid warmth of physical affection; tired birds coming to rest in a sheltering tree. The stronger he held the image, the better it’d work. "Maybe he wasn't interested in being your mate before." Super fucking unlikely, but Jisung didn't want to get caught up arguing the point. "Maybe he still isn't, but he does want to be in a pack with you. That doesn't mean nothing, Innie. He's putting a lot of faith in your choice of alpha and like he said, he doesn't have to join us to help out with the baby. Plenty of sires and dams co-parent after their packs break up. Unless you for sure don't want him around, I don't see the harm in giving him a chance." He also had zero qualms with making either of the sires help carry the weight of an unplanned pregnancy. He was fully in Hwang Hyunjin's court on that subject. Jeongin turned enough to give him a scorching look. "You're not defending hyung just to get a beta in the pack, are you? We've got a better option for that." "No, seriously I'm not!" Jisung held up both hands. "I just blurted out the solution thing because I was nervous." His brain hiccuped. "What better option?" Jeongin's gaze roamed over his face. "Are you asking for real? Changbin-hyung." His brain hiccuped again and it felt like his heart did too. "Did hyung say something?" Jeongin's eyebrows furrowed. "Not about joining the pack, but -" "Hold up," Jisung cut that off real quick, nevermind the plunge of disappointment in his chest. "We're not gonna court Binnie for the sake of convenience, either. He deserves better than that." "I don't know what you're thinking, but I was planning to go for him because he's hot and funny." Jisung couldn't argue with that. Seo Changbin was indeed hot and funny. He swallowed. “You’re going for him… for the pack?” Jeongin stared at him. “Hyung, seriously.” “It’s a legitimate question!” His voice rose. “Me being exclusive to the pack doesn’t mean you or Channie-hyung have to be! There’s space for that! If you and Changbin-hyung had a – if there was – feelings that -” "You'd be all right with that?" Jeongin interrupted. His tone was curious but something about the look in his eyes made Jisung wonder what his little omega thought he knew. “With Changbin-hyung being my outside lover?” Jisung’s throat grew thick and he had to swallow again. He remembered being sixteen and awkward with all the new feelings and impulses of his recently presented body, watching as the Seo Changbin who’d been lavishing attention on him for hours was just as doting and affectionate with the gaggle of friends he’d dragged Jisung out to meet. He remembered standing there with his non-existent shoulders and braces and acne flare-up, watching while people prettier and cooler than him got cooed over and wishing he could dissolve into the floor. Now, twenty-two year Han Jisung knew that his sixteen-year-old self had been needlessly fucking sensitive about the whole thing. Of course Changbin was sweet to his friends, those were people he’d known and cared about for years, and it wasn’t like Jisung had been going of his way to be good company. The Jisung was that day was just angry and insecure and stupidly immature. The Jisung of the today was certain he could handle either – or both – of his mates hooking up with Seo Changbin without him, if that was their inclination. He totally could. It was a good image. A beautiful one, in fact; Changbin, in his bomber jacket and glittering earrings, with Jeongin or Chan hanging off either arm – the sort of thing you'd want to see every chance you got, just so you could witness who they became around each other. But the more he imagined it as an arrangement that excluded him, the less it felt like something beautiful, and the more felt like being sixteen years old and having the blunt-force realization that he wasn’t uniquely special in Seo Changbin’s life. "No," Jisung said aloud, "Absolutely not." Jeongin breathed out. "Good, because I'm not interested in having someone without you. That counts for Hwang Hyunjin and anyone else who decides to show up, too." The tides of relief rose in Han Jisung once again. He smiled and tried, impossibly, to nuzzle closer. Jeongin abruptly stiffened. "Shit." Jisung got his legs out of the way. "Bathroom?" "No, no!" Jeongin started scrambling around, feeling through the front pockets of his hoodie and sweatpants. Oh, the 'where the fuck is my phone' dance. "Is it in your back pock -" "My bag." Jeongin yanked his crossbody bag around, nearly throttling himself in the process, and fumbled around inside until he could yank out his phone. A travel tube of toothpaste flew out across the room. He stared down at the screen. "How do I unblock someone?" Jisung had never blocked anyone in his life, not even spam calls, and so the two of them spent a couple minutes pocking around the phone settings. Bang Chang returned at the tail end of Jeongin successfully getting Hwang Hyunjin unblocked. "Hey, how is everything?" Chan asked, gentle and concerned, his gaze roving over the both of them. "...better?" Jisung ventured, giving Jeongin his own once over. The other omega was typing away on his phone, well past the crying fit that initially followed Chan leaving with Hyunjin. It hadn't lasted all that long and Jisung wasn't sure if that meant he wasn't as upset about the situation as he could be, or if he'd cried himself out elsewhere. So that was something, but Jisung didn't know where this new bout of urgency came from. "I need to make sure hyung doesn't tell anyone back at my university," Jeongin said, sensing their unspoken questions. He whined and tapped something else into the screen. "Of course he isn't checking his phone right now." "Ah, that," Chan said. Oh, that didn’t sound good. They both looked at up at him. Chan ruffled the hair at the back of his head. "Yeah, he got a call earlier. Whoever it was, he was telling them about the whole situation. I'd thought it might've been his courting pack, but..." He lifted one shoulder. But Hwang Hyunjin didn't have a pack, courting or otherwise. Jeongin’s arms dropped into his lap. He closed his eyes. “I’m so tired.” The dead, defeated tone set off alarm bells in Jisung’s gut “It could’ve been a family member,” he said, “There’s no guarantee it was someone from your university.” Jeongin shook his head without opening his eyes. “Can we go home?” “Of course, baby,” Jisung and Chan said at the same time. “Go with Sungie and I’ll be there in a couple hours,” Chan continued. Jeongin shook his head again and reached out to snag the edge of Bang Chan’s apron. “Hyung, please.” Not fully voicing his request, but not needing to, either. In Chan’s place, Jisung would’ve folded like wet paper. Just straight up kicked everyone out of the coffee shop and carried Jeongin home. Fortunately – or unfortunately – his alpha was both more sensible and stronger-willed in the face of Jeongin’s pleading eyebrows than Han Jisung could ever hope to be. Within a few minutes, he got Yang Jeongin thoroughly hugged, freshly scent marked, and sent out the door with Jisung in the lead. The walk back to their apartment felt twice as long as it had during Jisung’s mad dash over. Jeongin was listing sideways by the time they made it inside. In the doorway, he paused with a sort of miserable sound and then made a beeline for the closet. Jisung found a relatively empty spot against the wall for the shopping bags Bang Chan sent back with them, having promised to bring the rest along himself, and went to extract Jeongin from the closet before there was a repeat of mass laundry day. Jeongin pouted at being relocated to the bed, and proceeded to make the most tired, limp, tragic attempt at nesting Jisung had ever witnessed. Jisung kind of felt like a monster. “Just settle down, I’ll make it for you.” It took nearly half an hour, but he managed to put together something that didn’t make Jeongin wrinkle his nose and got them both stripped to their underwear and tucked inside it. Despite the nest and his clear exhaustion, Jeongin only managed to sleep in fifteen minute or so intervals. He kept getting kicked awake again, either to go to the bathroom or to re-adjust his position. After the third time, he said, “I’m gonna stay up until Channie-hyung gets home.” “You want to listen to some music?” Jisung asked. Jeongin grunted and didn’t make another sound. He’d already passed out again. Jisung felt increasingly bad about not letting him nest in the closet. The doctor had said Jeongin would start needing an enclosed den at about week 30 or so, but what if the stress of everything was setting off that need sooner? Was tormenting his omega worth it just to get out of doing laundry? Bang Chan thankfully returned home before Jeongin woke up for the fifth time, carting the rest of Jeongin's new things. He was sweaty and short-of-breath, but not on the verge of death like Jisung had been. The diaper bag that hung cross-ways over his chest gave Jisung an oddly warm, squiggly feeling. Jisung climbed off the bed to explain the dilemma to him in a low whisper, an effort rendered useless by Jeongin struggling up into a sitting position by the time they turned around again. “Channie-hyung,” Jeongin called. He secured his hands on Chan’s hips when the alpha reached him and pressed his face into Chan’s middle. “Take care of me.” “Always, baby,” Chan said, cradling his head, “What do you need?” Jeongin tilted his head back, his wide mouth parted and lips soft. “Love me. Don’t play.” “I won’t,” Chan promised and leaned down to kiss him. Jisung helped shove aside his laboriously arranged nesting materials so they wouldn’t get caught in the “splash zone” and then helped get Chan out of his clothes, too, since he was there anyway. It was tempting to insert himself further, to slide his hands over Chan’s back and around to his sensitive belly, to put all the little techniques he’d learned for working up his alpha to use, but Jeongin was the one who needed Chan’s attention right now. Jisung could wait. Besides, watching them was hardly a burden. Jeongin was languid and sweetly accommodating; Chan slow and deliberate; their kisses almost lazy, lips not quite meeting as their tongues slid together. Chan eased Jeongin up onto his side, facing where Jisung sat at the edge of the bed, and settled in behind him. Jeongin’s head dropped against Chan’s bicep, eyes heavy and dark, a vivid flush painted all over his cheeks and neck. Jisung smiled at his hazy regard and took the hand he reached out, kissing the knuckles. Their fingers stayed interlocked while Chan pressed in. Jeongin’s long frame arched back in reaction to the deep, steady pressure, wet red mouth opening around wordless cries. The air was rich with honey and burning spice, a thick blanket of musk laid out underneath. Chan had one of Jeongin’s legs pulled up and back over his own hips, showcasing where they melded together. He set a steady rocking pace and Jisung’s own body throbbed along in time. They made such a beautiful shape together and Jisung wanted to photographic it, film it, immortalize it somehow. It felt like a singular moment, the sort of thing that wouldn’t be easily repeated; Jeongin at sixteen weeks and starting to really show it, his manner unusually pliant and submissive; Chan gentle and achingly tender in every movement, the full force of his attention tied up in the loved one that needed him. Jisung wished he could keep it and revisit it over and over. In the end, the moment didn’t last that much longer. Several of thrusts in, Jeongin drew taut and then sighed into a soft, shuddering orgasm. His eyes were closed the whole time and in less than a minute, his barely-labored breathing deepened and evened out. His whole body went lax. Jisung and Chan - who’d come to a stop after working through the last of Jeongin’s aftershocks - watched his cute, sleeping face for a long moment. Jisung reached out to tap Chan’s bicep. “Karma,” he whispered, gesturing to where Chan was still unsatisfied. Bang Chan made a face at him. Jeongin let out a tiny, breathy snore, like he wasn’t currently speared on a rock-hard erection. Adorable. “Are you just going to wait until you -” Jisung flopped his hand over. The look that got him suggested Chan was torn between mauling him for sexy reasons and mauling him for annoyance reasons. Jisung honestly wouldn’t have minded either. He tried to look innocently curious and not like he was in the midst of soaking through his boxers. Chan sighed and shook his head. “I don’t want to disturb him,” he whispered back. But he didn’t seem to want to wait there, either, and after another beat of hesitation, he carefully moved Jeongin’s leg back down and pulled himself free. Jeongin didn’t stir in the slightest – dead asleep now that he was reassured of his alpha’s presence and no longer fighting the demands of his body. He continued to remain unmoved while Chan got off the bed and Jisung fished the packet of wet wipes out from under one of the clothing piles to clean him up. By the time their omega was tidy and tucked under the comforter with a few fragments of the nest snuggled around him, Bang Chan had calmed down a fair bit, but not enough to lose the heated edge to his gaze and scent. “How quiet do you think you can be?” he asked, slipping two fingers under the waistband of Jisung’s boxers. Not very. Jisung did not want to miss this chance, though, and after glancing around, snagged a clean-ish shirt off the floor to shove in his mouth. It was way too big for this purpose, the entire rest of the shirt hanging down one side of his mouth almost to his navel. He gave Bang Chan a thumbs up. Chan’s sparkling eyes crinkled into slits and his lips rolled together, visibly fighting back a laugh. He tucked his face alongside Jisung’s. “How are you this perfect?” ‘Talent’, Jisung might have said, for the sake of being funny, or ‘I’m literally not’, if he was feeling more honest. Deprived of both, he settled for pulling his alpha, his Channie-hyung, down onto the floor with him and into the welcoming spread of his thighs. The improvised gag was only half-way effective as Chan brought him off once and then twice for good measure, before finally finishing himself. Jeongin thankfully slept through every partially muffled whimper and plea. “Bleh, bleh.” Jisung worked his tongue around in his dried-out mouth. “We could’ve gotten one of the actual gags,” Chan mumbled into Jisung’s shoulder. “You remember where they are?” Chan didn’t answer, which was probably a ‘no’. He kissed his way up Jisung’s neck to his mouth and generously helped resolve the moisture issue. Jisung was feeling pleasantly limp and just starting to get chilled from the blast of the AC on his sweat-damp skin, when a memory slammed full force into his brain. “Innie likes Binnie-hyung,” he said, the words coming out louder than he intended. Chan pulled back a little, a curious look on his still-flushed face. “Yeah? That’s good. I was hoping they’d get along.” “I mean he like-likes hyung. Wants to try and get him interested in the pack.” Chan’s expression turned complicated. “Did Bin say something?” “That’s what I asked!” Jisung whispered, smacking Chan’s shoulder in counterpoint to his agitation, “He didn’t, Innie just likes him and wants to go for it.” Chan chewed on his lower lip. “Are you okay with that?” He was now. “Yeah,” Jisung said, not wanting to rehash all his insecurities just then, “I’d – I’d like to have hyung in the pack. I’d really like it. I just don’t know if he’d want to. He’s never been into me that way.” “Yeah?” Chan seemed surprised by that, for some reason. He looked like he was about to say something else, but sighed instead. He jostled Jisung gently and shifted him off his lap. “I want to talk more, but not while Innie is sleeping,” he said, “And not when it feels like my brain is dripping out my ears.” Jisung groaned in agreement. They peeled themselves up off the floor and took turns cleaning up. Freshly rinsed and poured into clean boxers and an undershirt, Jisung checked his phone while fiddling with the folded-over ear of the pig stuffie Jeongin brought home. He had one new message from an unsaved number.
82 1▐ ▐▐▐ ▐▐▐ Jisung re-wrote a greeting three different times and finally settled for a basic [hello] and saved Hyunjin’s number to his contact list. He tapped his way over to his last chat with Changbin and threw a [I hope you had a good time with Innie today. I’m sorry you had to leave right away] in there, as well. He agonized for a full minute before adding, [Let’s hang out again soon, hyung. I miss you.] Neither of them responded in the time it took Chan to come back to bed. Jisung plugged in his phone and tossed it on the nearest clothing pile, to be ignored until morning. |